I have a secret to tell you all.
(And I don’t reaaaally want to tell you, but she made me promise I would…)
So y’know how Dr Drake Ramoray in Friends has an evil twin brother called Hans?
HI I’M KATY AND I HAVE AN EVIL TWIN SISTER CALLED LILY.
It’s true. Honest. Here’s a photo of us together to prove it.
See? Totally legit.
She’s a bit of a smirky, manipulative cow to be honest.
Y’know Georgina Sparks in Gossip Girl? She’s kinda like that.
Like, yeah, I love her and all… But if we were at Hogwarts, she would totally be a Slytherin.
And I would definitely, totally, 100% be a Hufflepuff.
I’m sunny and bubbly and love my friends and hugs and food. She’s selfish and ambitious and manipulative and has REALLY good hair.
She’s also really good at turning on the charm when she wants something.
Like this post for instance.
This is MY blog. Katy’s Blog. Little Miss Katy, not Little Miss Lily.
And she’s never ever mentioned it before, and I figured she just didn’t even care.
But then out of the blue, she popped over my shoulder as I was looking through the Halloween Collection on ASOS and was all:
Oh Katy darling (she calls everyone darling – pretentious much?), why don’t we do a Halloween-themed outfit shoot together!
And I laughed in her face and said no thank you.
But she got all “offended” that I never talk about her on here and suddenly (I have no idea how) here I am dedicating an entire blog post to her.
I told you she was manipulative.
So then she was like: Oh Katy darling, seeing as it’s your blog, I’ll take your photos first shall I?
I was suspicious. (Obviously. Because Evil Twin Sister.) But I said OK.
And, actually, I can’t be bothered doing all that Halloween stuff now… why don’t we do really CASUAL outfits instead?
But again, I said yes. (Because I’m a Hufflepuff and we’re trusting and lovely and stupid like that.)
So I shoved on my usual daily outfit of jeans, trainers, shirt, oversized jumper and pretty necklace… and I actually really liked the photos!
She went inside to get changed, and I started to think that maybe I’d misjudged my Twin Sister…
Maybe she wasn’t evil at all!
Maybe we could have a sisterly hug when we’d finished taking her photos!
Maybe we could even order pizza and cuddle up on the couch together and watch Harry Potter!
But no. Obviously no.
Because then she came out looking like a Witch Queen wearing THE MOST FABULOUS DRESS EVER.
Outshining me by 10000% as she always does.
And this is why I never let her be on my blog.
Seriously, have you ever seen anyone so smirky in your life?
She’s such a show-off.
And no, I’m not jealous!
This has absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that her little black dress is utterly gorgeous and that I’m unbelievably jealous and want it in my wardrobe.
Nope. Not at all.
I don’t care that the lining is soft and smooth, and that the lace is intricate and delicate and beautiful.
It has the most amazing skater shape, with a crop-top overlay and perfect-length sleeves?
So there you go.
That’s Lily, my Evil Twin Sister.
The beautiful Slytherin diva who upstaged me on my own blog.
What a bitch.
*As if I didn’t hate her enough already, Lily was GIFTED her dress!
She insists that she only wanted to feature it
on my blog because she loves it so much…
But I wouldn’t believe her if I were you.
She’s probably lying.
She’s just that kind of person.