It’s been a while since I last did one of these, which seems WEIRD now that I think about it.
As I mentioned the other day, I’ve been unknowingly battling with SAD for a few weeks.
Seasonal Affective Disorder affects people in different ways, but the main symptoms are lethargy and moodiness. I was sleeping 9 hours a night, but always felt tired. I snapped at everyone. It also left me crying over nothing, with no energy to write, and feeling worthless and guilty.
Over time, I convinced myself that I was horrible person, that my boyfriend deserved better, that my friends hated me, that I sucked at my job, that no one cared about my blog, and that I should just give up trying to do anything because I was useless.
Honestly? I’m mostly annoyed that it took me so long to realise that those feelings weren’t my own.
I finally bought a daylight lamp on Friday (on the recommendation of pretty much all of Twitter) and after a couple of days soaking up the light, my brain is finally starting to feel like my own again.
It’s weird, because now I’m starting to feel better, the last couple of weeks seem like a dream. I can barely remember what I did most days. Watch TV and sleep I think!
I didn’t want to go out or see my friends, I didn’t want to read or write or do anything interesting. I feel like I’ve lost a month of my life and that SUCKS.
But Christmas is this week (THIS WEEK?!). I’m off work on Wednesday, flying home on Thursday, and I’ve got 5 days of sunshine before I come back in time for New Year’s. I’m determined to make the most of what’s left of December.
And I’ve got so many plans for 2017!
I want to do more recipes and fashion posts; I want to improve my photography and learn how to work in RAW; Gary and I are joining the gym together; and I’ve already got four incredible trips planned including a girly weekend in Bucharest and a family wedding in Greece…
IT’S GOING TO BE AWESOME.
1. Warsaw. WHAT a city! I went on a press trip to Warsaw with Hilton Hotels, and it was seriously amazing. The history is fascinating, the food is insaaaaaanely good, and the Old Town is one of the prettiest places I’ve ever been. I’m already planning a trip back with Gary next Christmas!
2. Hufflepuff pyjamas. Gary’s parents got me actual legit Hufflepuff PJs for Christmas. I squealed.
3. Our Christmas tree. I wanted a real one and Gary wanted a fake one, so we compromised on a GIANT fake one. 8 feet of pure (plastic) fluffy pine goodness. Lights, baubles, star on the top. I love it so much and am currently trying to convince Gary that Christmas trees are for life, not just for Christmas.
4. #TodayImGrateful. On days when I’ve felt particularly disconnected and depressed, I’ve really enjoyed scrolling through Katie’s amazing hashtag. Little things to remind you why life is actually pretty darn awesome.
5. SAD Lamp. I asked you on Twitter about your most effective SAD remedies, and about 98% of you said a SAD daylight lamp. So I went to Maplin and bought one (this one) and after 3 days of sitting in front of it for an hour, I already feel a million times better. Hooray for light therapy!
6. Chris Pratt. Gary and I finished watching Parks and Rec last week, and I finally saw Guardians of the Galaxy last night, and look, it just has to be said ok? CHRIST PRATT IS INSANELY HOT.
7. Speak Out. We went to a Christmas party with friends on Saturday, and had an INSANELY great night of food, wine, food, music and food. Someone brought over the game ‘Speak Out’ as well, which is a game where you put a giant plastic mould in your mouth to hold it wide open, and then you have to read out phrases from the cards, and your team has to guess what you’re saying. It’s utterly ridiculous and I gave myself a stitch from laughing so hard.
8. Clare’s wine hack going viral. You may have seen this tweet doing the rounds on the internet last week. The fridge belongs to my internet pal Clare, and I’ve basically not stopped laughing since. From Buzzfeed to Ashton Kutcher to Jimmy Fallon, every new development has had me absolutely howling.
9. Takeaway. Gary and I ordered Chinese last night and the crispy chilli beef and vegetable chow mein is everything I wanted in my belly. Now please excuse me whilst I go cry about how my jeans don’t fit me anymore…
10. Disney Life. Disney have a subscription-based video service (a bit like Netflix) which is available in the UK and basically has all the Disney films on it. You get 7 days free trial so I signed up on my first sick day last week and have been getting through about three Disney films a day since (including all three High School Musical movies AND the Sharpay spin-off. No shame. None.)
I’ve just realised this will probably be the last Happy Monday of the year!
I might do a big roundup post or something next week, but Monday is Boxing Day, and I doubt anyone will be interested in reading blogs. Personally, I plan on napping in the sun, eating all the leftover pigs in blankets (Mum always makes extra for this exact reason!) and mayyyyyyybe playing some Monopoly with my sister.
So, there will be a few other posts coming up this week, but I’m going to take advantage of having you here right now to say:
I WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I hope you have a wonderful time over the holidays :)